Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Life goes on...

Well, for some anyway...
grasshopperporn

So the spot we are parked now is actually IN the city. It offers electric and sewer service without the sterility of the last campground we were in.
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We are located right along the Jordan River Trail, which is really nice, and I haven't suffered from generator blues in at least 2 whole weeks.
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I am kind of glad we are parked here. For one, I'm tired. It offers me a chance to recover from the summer in virtual luxury. Two, I get to go do "city stuff" like go to the FARMERS MARKET.
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Strangely enough, there is no farmer's market in the middle of the desert. You have to go to the city to get your veg.
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I love the farmers market. I always buy too many veggies though. I bought fresh basil this time. It made the car smell great. I then made fresh pesto. It made the house smell GREAT. Then I slathered it all over a pizza, because my kids (sagan and mark) LIKE pizza.
pestopizza
My tummy thought it was GREAT. I also bought lots of cucumbers, which mark hates, and beets, which he also seems to think he hates. And I bought okra... which he also hates. My taste buds and colon are NOT going to suffer just because he chooses to eat broccolli and carrots ONLY. I happen to LIKE variety (in my veggies anyway) and I figure if I'm the one that does most of the cooking, I'll choose what I cook. I'm just glad that most of what I cook is HEALTHY. Maybe someday, somebody will thank me. Riiiiiiight. Well, maybe their colon will. ;-)
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Just a quick bit about ELIMINATION COMMUNICATION, also known as EC'ing. When Ember was born and for months afterwards, I was just too busy to practice this, but she was pretty good at it on her own. She poo'd AFTER the diaper came off. She fussed horribly if her diaper was wet or soiled. Once she was big enough to sit on her own though, we introduced the Little Potty. She LOVES IT!
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I catch at least 1 poo a day and 2-4 pees. YAY for fewer diapers! YAY for natural baby hygiene! YAY FOR DOING THINGS THE WAY NATURE INTENDED!!!
What did people do before the invention of the disposable diaper? They used ECing. Now don't get me wrong. My baby isn't "potty trained" in the traditional sense, however she will be by 2ish. The others were. HOW? HOW can a baby THAT YOUNG use the potty? Well, let's hear it for EC. You give them the OPPORTUNITY to sit on the potty, in a position that is NATURALLY conducive to elimination at logical times of day and let them sit. Sometimes she goes, sometimes she doesn't, but she HAS THE OPPORTUNITY. I don't force her to use her diaper. She doesn't like the feeling of having wet or soiled herself, why would I insist she put it in the diaper? Why would I WANT her to associate a covering on her body with elimination?
Cloth diapers are amazing in that they are soft, environmentally responsible, healthier on baby and inexpensive. The added bonus of cloth diapers is that they teach the baby about body functions and when they go, they have IMMEDIATE sensation of having went. When they wet, the diaper is WET. When they poo, the diaper STINKS and feels icky. When you raise a baby in disposables, you DIAPER train them before you POTTY train them. You train them to GO IN THE DIAPER. When it comes time to potty train, you then have to re-train them to go in the potty, after teaching them to go in the diaper. Sounds awful to me to have to potty train twice. I use disposables from time to time. I use them if we are going to be in the car for a while, or sometimes at night. Of course Mark would RATHER use them because he doesn't CARE about the environment and they seem "easier" to him. I end up changing all/most of the diapers. I'm good with that. I hate disposables. There is a place for them, I guess, but honestly I feel better when I NEVER use them. Disposables keep the baby SO DRY that they have no idea what the feeling of urinating is like.
emberpotty
They are perfumed and processed in a way that makes me say ICK! They are awful for the environment. They contain KNOWN carcinogens (what doesn't?) but most of all, they keep our babies in diapers for 3-4 years and the pockets of diaper manufacturers FAT. -End EC preach session.

Beware September cuteness to follow...
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So what did you do in school today Sagan?
"I climbed the rock that I've wanted to climb now for a year."
saganclimb1
We stopped by the Great Salt Lake to hang out for a bit.
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Mark votes that we re-name it "The OK Salt Lake". I still refer to it as "The Great Sea".
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Pelicans on the lake.

So we are looking for a place to live. We don't have any money, but we look anyway. Seems nothing has been paid but the car, truck, camper & insurance for some time now. Did I know this? Nope. Does it upset me? OF COURSE it does. Do I mind that all the things that I own, which are in storage may be gone because Mark neither paid it, told me he didn't pay it NOR did he move it? You bet. I'm stressed that my phone will probably be shut off any day and that maybe both the truck and the car will be gone by morning. Anything I can do about it? Well, since I don't work, I have no money to pay for it. I'm not going to get a job and leave my kids until every single resource has been used up because I believe they belong with me, not some stranger to raise them. I'm not selling my engagement ring to pay for it because I may need that to pay for my livelihood and a way out of this mess. You know, survival. What can I do? Well, I can hope that it gets dealt with. If it doesn't, I'll mourn the loss of many of my personal belongings just as I did when Bayleigh's dad allowed himself to be evicted while I was in California. Along with the only quilt my maternal grandmother ever made, he let them take it all away. It is said that attachments are what causes immeasurable suffering. I can agree with that. I'm tired of suffering. I would like to be more detached. If Mark doesn't find a way to get my stuff back, I guess I'll have to manage. :-(
It makes me sad that things have become so messy. So much I could have done if only I had KNOWN. I guess there are lessons here for us all. I sure hope I'm getting them. Be more proactive? Be more nosy? Be more BOSSY? Yeah, I dunno. I guess the lesson is NEVER DEPEND ON ANYONE BUT YOURSELF. That's really the only thing I can say that would have made this different. I just thought after 2 years of knowing the guy and taking care of myself and watching him that I was in a safer and more secure situation than it turned out to be. *sigh* That's what I get for thinking, huh?

Fall is upon us and I have visions of a bright, sunny kitchen and lots of windows that face SOUTH. A fireplace would be icing on the cake. I fear the winter and the darkness that it brings me. I'm hoping in spite of it all that I can find comfort in cooking, mothering and overall winter adventures. I still don't know what the future holds, but for now, I am holding strong in the things that actually ARE STRONG. What is THAT you ask? Well... me. I guess that really just means my ability to survive and endure. I don't know where I will be this time next month. I just hope for the best for us all.

1 comment:

Lynnster said...

Ember looks so happy on her Little Potty it's kinda making me want one. Hehe. Love these pics, Ember is such a cutie and jeez, I swear Sagan has suddenly grown up in the last month. Ai yi yi, she doesn't look so much like a little kid anymore.